Round 1

Have you ever been so tired that you're afraid to fall asleep? Like, maybe somehow you think somebody is going to be watching you. I feel like I can't dream on my own anymore. The dreams always involve the people I'm most afraid of. I can't come into contact with them in real life and the only way to be a part of their lives is through dreaming.

I don't mean to be a coward, but this is who I am.

I want this to be an apology...but so far, I'm the only person who thinks I've done something wrong. I don't like climbing into bed. I don't want to dream if I can only dream of one thing. My eyesight is going bad.....and so is my heart.

Heart disease is a state of mind in my case.

I don't want to know what anybody thinks. I just want to fall over. Down and down. So far down that only I can pick myself up. I want to be on my own.

This is why I can't get a date to prom. I'm afraid of being alone, but I'm more afraid of being with someone. What if they see who I really am...scared...vulnerable...overrated. I can't deal with that.

If he can dance by himself, then so can I.

I'll tell you my "almost prom date" story another day.

"For me the greif is still too near."

you're goddam right it is.